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04. 01. 2009

Gmail Auto-pilot

gmailcadie.jpg
Spam filters work to some degree, but you still get those offers from Nigerian princes at least once a day and sometimes just hitting "mark as junk" doesn't quite cut it. You want revenge, you want to wreak some havoc. But who has time? Now, with Gmail Auto-Pilot powered by CADIE (Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity), you can send a nasty, passive-aggressive, snide reply without any effort. Auto-Pilot uses advanced natural language synthesis to mimic your own writing style, complete with tone, grammar and spelling mistakes to compose a reply based on filters you set up.

Have an annoying friend who persists in contacting you despite you ignoring them? Are you avoiding a break-up with someone too depressed to handle it at the moment? With advanced CADIE analysis, Auto-Pilot determines when it's time to let them know the truth and without any input from you, Auto-Pilot will compose the email which will end the heartache for them, and more importantly for you.

Stop complaining about your email inbox overflowing- and let the new Auto-Pilot take over. The more Auto-Pilot analyzes your writing style, the more transparently it can become you. Eventually, you may not need to check your email again- EVER.

Posted by Mia    Category: on the web
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Comments (4)

Misty:

You do realize this is their annual April fools' joke, right?

April fools joke. Anyone who doesn't get this is dumb.

Ozzie:

Um, anyone who doesn't get that this post is a joke.... "You may not need to check your email again, EVER"? Clearly a joke.

Mia:

Not to worry- this post is a joke- reporting Google's joke as if it were a real story. Sorry, thought that was clear. The Buzzword watch is also a joke, and the post is a joke.

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