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04. 01. 2009

Gmail Auto-pilot

Spam filters work to some degree, but you still get those offers from Nigerian princes at least once a day and sometimes just hitting "mark as junk" doesn't quite cut it. You want revenge, you want to wreak some havoc. But who has time? Now, with Gmail Auto-Pilot powered by CADIE (Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity), you can send a nasty, passive-aggressive, snide reply without any effort. Auto-Pilot uses advanced natural language synthesis to mimic your own writing style, complete with tone, grammar and spelling mistakes to compose a reply based on filters you set up.

Have an annoying friend who persists in contacting you despite you ignoring them? Are you avoiding a break-up with someone too depressed to handle it at the moment? With advanced CADIE analysis, Auto-Pilot determines when it's time to let them know the truth and without any input from you, Auto-Pilot will compose the email which will end the heartache for them, and more importantly for you.

Stop complaining about your email inbox overflowing- and let the new Auto-Pilot take over. The more Auto-Pilot analyzes your writing style, the more transparently it can become you. Eventually, you may not need to check your email again- EVER.

Posted by Mia    Category: on the web
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Comments (4)


You do realize this is their annual April fools' joke, right?

April fools joke. Anyone who doesn't get this is dumb.


Um, anyone who doesn't get that this post is a joke.... "You may not need to check your email again, EVER"? Clearly a joke.


Not to worry- this post is a joke- reporting Google's joke as if it were a real story. Sorry, thought that was clear. The Buzzword watch is also a joke, and the post is a joke.

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