Right. Because Kewpie dolls aren't scary or weird enough on their own, Strapya World took it upon themselves to offer the strangest assortment of 1.57-inch Kewpie cell phone charms the world has ever seen.

There's the one that's in the process of melting into a puddle, the anorexic one, the fat one, the sperm one (yes, you read that right), and the one called simply "Gross Q." Not only am I about to lose my lunch, but I'm also quite shocked at how big those brains are.

Available now for about $6 each.

Via Shiny Shiny.